The French have elevated COMPLAINING to an art form, a competitive sport even; at a minimum, it’s a favorite pastime. Don’t get me wrong, we love France, but there are definitely things here that have tested our patience and made us grumbly at times.

• The HOUSING here has been so difficult. Finding a place that meets our needs in a neighborhood in which we want to live, whose owner also wants to rent it to us, has nearly broken us some days.
  • The online photos of places to live here are so bad. Not only is there no effort given to presentation of the space, there are no photos of the fronts of the houses or addresses given, maybe only blurry photos of a bathtub or a fireplace, and if you’re lucky, a shot of the yard. There are no centralized systems to look for them either.
  • Nothing is as clean as we’d want it to be, even if they’ve been “professionally” cleaned. We’re not neat freaks, but are still exhausted from dealing with other people’s funk so we can feel comfortable where we lay our heads.
• The WINDOWS have no screens and so bugs can go in and out at their convenience. Screens are nearly impossible to install as the windows generally open inward like doors, but we’re looking into temporary stick-on screens for the bedrooms, at least.
• The HEAT waves have been so frequent and lasted so long, the last was 8-9 days over 90F (32C) degrees with no air conditioning. The French generally hate A/C and seem content to complain about the heat and sweat in it, while sharing their fear that air conditioning causes illness. Even if you manage to buy a portable air conditioner here, the venting is nearly impossible with the way the windows work.
• A small gripe: independent stores are closed in late July and August, sometimes up to six weeks as people take their annual vacations. There are three bakeries within a 10-minute walk of our house and all three are closed right now. A little coordination is all we’re asking!

We’ve reached the phase in our time in France that is very common and hits most people who take this leap abroad about now (3-4 months in). It’s the “I want to go home” phase that happens after the newness and delight wears off a little and real life resumes with its predictability and known-ness, both good and bad, albeit in a new country where everything is different. Near-daily shopping, appointments, paperwork, crowds on public transit, and searching for needed items or services that may or may not exist here or go by completely different names or sold in places you’d never think of.

The thing is for us, home isn’t a place, it’s a feeling that we’re wanting. We want our city, neighborhood, and home to feel like home and we’re not quite there yet. France is not the America where we’ve lived our whole lives — and that’s both a good and a bad thing for us. We want all the good of France, AND we also want to have the things we liked in America to be available to us here. Family and friends, comfortable furniture, the right peanut butter, screens(!), and feeling like we know how to accomplish the things we want/need to do.

Slowly though, we are making progress. We remind ourselves of that every day, while guiding the spiders outside or successfully setting up appointments for things on the phone using our improving Fran-glish skills. People have been so kind to us. The city, countryside, and bike riding are breathtakingly beautiful. The pastries and bread are freaking AMAZING!

We’ll get through this phase, soon we hope. In the meantime, we’ll be here looking for the all good in our day-to-day lives. More croissants please!